On Whiteness, Identity, and Sliced Bread

One of the most dangerous things that people of pallor created when they decided that being accepted as a person of pallor was somehow better than sliced bread was creating the homogenized identity that we all know as whiteness.

People of pallor are so generationally removed from their identities, their cultural identities, and so deep in the trenches of white conformity and norms that a person of pallor being "unapologetically white" is a hate crime waiting to happen. Like so many people of culture, Black, Brown, and Indigenous folx, folx from AAPI communities are so proud of their identities and wear them proudly. I'm unapologetically Black. I have rarely felt fear when a person of culture shares how proud they are of their culture and heritage. But the moment I see and hear a person of pallor screaming about being "unapologetically white" or "white pride," I feel a chill up my spine because it always comes with a bucket of hate speech, fragility, and violence.

Think about how messed up it is to create a construct to trumpet to the heavens that you're somehow superior to any person with deeper tones in their skin than your own, only to make the most paper-thin and traumatized faux culture in the history of the world, one that has done irreparable generational damage to people of pallor while placing everyone else in a constant state of danger.

I prefer sliced bread.

This Week's Opening Thought: April 1, 2024

This week's opening thought for people of pallor: The levels of obliviousness, hatred, and ignorance you have to have in your unmelanated bodies to weaponize the acronym DEI and try to re-position it as "Didn't Earn It" when people of pallor have been getting by on being just people of pallor for centuries is hilarious.

Real talk? I've got my issues with DEI initiatives. I don't think they go far enough - but I understand why. I think DEI is a series of deep and necessary conversations and reflections on who we are as individuals and a collective that the dominant culture has neutered. I think DEI has been diluted by white supremacist ideology in many circles to cater to people of pallor who can't find it in them to acknowledge that history, generational trauma, and epigenetics play a part in the oppressive states we exist in to the point where we can do and be better as a society. I also think DEI should never be under Human Resources's banner in a workplace because that's where progress goes to die. But damn.

"Didn't Earn It?"

Really, people of pallor?

"Didn't Earn It?"

Most of y'all's "heroes" and "luminaries" are nepo and trust fund babies. Most of them have used people like you as stepping stones to achieving more wealth than any of our families will see in seven lifetimes.

"Didn't Earn It?"

Most of y'all have built careers and businesses on being unmelanated, generic, and mediocre with an inflated sense of ego and entitlement. Most of y'all think you're the most competent person in the room, even around topics you know nothing about. Meanwhile, Black and Brown folx, Indigenous folx, and melanated communities, in general, have spent decades of their lives grappling with possibly being the smartest person in a room full of fragile people of pallor but having to be quiet so you aren't singled out and harmed. So many communities of color have had to code-switch or assimilate to survive and keep a roof over their heads.

"Didn't Earn It?"

I've watched as people of pallor come into workplaces, contribute less than a minimum effort, barely come to work, do long-term irreparable harm to everyone around them unless they bow to their will, and get praise for being a good hand and countless promotions and raises. Meanwhile, I've watched as Black and Brown folx, Indigenous folx, and people of color get written up for calling out isms and phobias in meetings, standing up for themselves, or publicly chided for the one time we're 10 minutes late.

"Didn't Earn It?"

Some of y'all are aiming your self-loathing and feelings of inadequacy in the wrong direction.

P.S.: The unmitigated gall it takes to weaponize an acronym for life work dedicated to making our world a more equitable and inclusive place for everyone as a racial slur, then to use it to do further harm to the people and families impacted by the Francis Scott Key Bridge collapse and the Black mayor of Baltimore shows how vile and fragile some of y'all are.

Some Thoughts on Transgender Day of Visibility

Today is Trans Day of Visibility, and I want to be very clear where I stand on support for trans communities. To my trans friends and colleagues, I see you. You matter. Your lives matter. Your bravery in being openly who you are in a world that poses so many dangers to you is resonant. I wish y’all didn’t have to fight so hard to live and love and be seen as human beings who shouldn’t have to constantly prove they deserve rights and safety but I will never stop standing with y’all and fighting for you.

I stand with trans folx not just on Trans Day of Visibility but the other 364 days of the year. And I stand on business, because I know how integral trans folx, and how important Black and Brown trans folx, are and have been to civil and human rights progress for countless decades. No one has rights if any community has to constantly fight for them, and I know y’all have firsthand knowledge of this struggle. Y’all didn’t abandon me and mine, even as some of my kinfolk are the arbiters of your trauma. I’ll never abandon you and your causes because your needs are valid and real.

To my trans friends and colleagues, I hope today is a day of being seen and cherished. I hope it’s a day of healing and love. And I hope this all spreads through every day of the rest of your year and lifetime.

This Week's Opening Thought: March 25, 2024

This week’s opening thought, for Black folx: So I wake up this weekend and see the news that some Black folx are defending Candace Owens after the hatemongers she spent so much time cozying up to dropped her ass to the point where now she’s trying to curry favor with Black communities via homophobic, transphobic social media posts and a grift on Go Fund Me. And all this after the hatemongers of pallor dropped her because even THEY thought she was too hateful and anti-Semitic to kick it with anymore.

After all the anti-Black sh— Candace has said and done, some of y'all are out here right now like, “She has some valid points.”

No.

No, she does not.

Candace ain't here for y'all. She’s using you for her grift because the people of pallor she so desperately wants to serve have discarded her, so she’s trying to tap into the stereotypes of the Black communities she has dragged for a decade and playing on the anti-Blackness many of y'all dabble in around homophobia and transphobia.

Candace is still the same bag of crap she has always been. Candace ain’t spitting knowledge. She just decided to tap into the “Ain’t all skinfolk kinfolk” Venn diagram to try and save herself from the obscurity she deserves. And some of y’all are so anti-Black that y’all think she’s spittin’ fire because said fire makes you feel seen.

You really wanna be seen by Candace Owens?

Your anti-Blackness is showing.

On Ryan, Diane, and Wishes

As I take a moment to reflect on the week, like I do every Friday, I think about how much I want my people to feel safe, seen, heard, and rested.

I think about Ryan Gainer and how he should still be here if law enforcement officers were taught that the intersection of race and ASD often leads to fatal action at the hands of those claiming to serve and protect. I think about how his family will never be settled. I fear for the next Black person on the spectrum who finds themselves dealing with the police.

I think about Dianne Abbott and how she should be able to speak truth to power without being silenced and diminished by people of pallor who can't fathom the reality that their niceties are neatly packaged hatred. I think about the calls for violence against her life led by a pale millionaire who will likely face no repercussions for his rhetoric.

I sit with all of this and wonder why this is part of the Black existence, this pervasive fear for our lives, livelihood, and safety. Questions pop into my head:

How does it feel to be carefree and never honestly think about your life constantly being on the line for just existing?

What would people of pallor do if they were looking at a lifetime of scrutiny and danger for doing everyday things they take for granted?

What if having a disability increased their chances of being harmed by society because of the melanin in their skin?

Would people of pallor tell the truth about their traumatic experiences at the hands of the so-called dominant class if their lives and livelihood were in danger because of the discomfort those truths caused?

I ask those questions and then check myself because I know these questions never arise for most people of pallor. I know they never put themselves in our shoes; even if they did, they'd complain about the fit.

I wish Black lives and safety weren't a novelty.

I wish we could rest with a deep, whole-body rest that allows our bodies and brains to cry, exhale, and cry some more until we feel less weary.

I wish for things I'll never see in my lifetime, but that doesn't mean I'll stop wishing.

I want my people to feel safe, seen, heard, and rested.

I know that's too much to ask for in a world fueled by white supremacy.

[Image description: Two images. The first picture is of a young Black man from California named Ryan Gainer. He can be seen smiling at the camera while standing in a parking lot. The second picture is of a Black woman named Diane Abbott. She was the first Black woman elected to the British Parliament. She is seen smiling at the camera.]