On Ryan, Diane, and Wishes

As I take a moment to reflect on the week, like I do every Friday, I think about how much I want my people to feel safe, seen, heard, and rested.

I think about Ryan Gainer and how he should still be here if law enforcement officers were taught that the intersection of race and ASD often leads to fatal action at the hands of those claiming to serve and protect. I think about how his family will never be settled. I fear for the next Black person on the spectrum who finds themselves dealing with the police.

I think about Dianne Abbott and how she should be able to speak truth to power without being silenced and diminished by people of pallor who can't fathom the reality that their niceties are neatly packaged hatred. I think about the calls for violence against her life led by a pale millionaire who will likely face no repercussions for his rhetoric.

I sit with all of this and wonder why this is part of the Black existence, this pervasive fear for our lives, livelihood, and safety. Questions pop into my head:

How does it feel to be carefree and never honestly think about your life constantly being on the line for just existing?

What would people of pallor do if they were looking at a lifetime of scrutiny and danger for doing everyday things they take for granted?

What if having a disability increased their chances of being harmed by society because of the melanin in their skin?

Would people of pallor tell the truth about their traumatic experiences at the hands of the so-called dominant class if their lives and livelihood were in danger because of the discomfort those truths caused?

I ask those questions and then check myself because I know these questions never arise for most people of pallor. I know they never put themselves in our shoes; even if they did, they'd complain about the fit.

I wish Black lives and safety weren't a novelty.

I wish we could rest with a deep, whole-body rest that allows our bodies and brains to cry, exhale, and cry some more until we feel less weary.

I wish for things I'll never see in my lifetime, but that doesn't mean I'll stop wishing.

I want my people to feel safe, seen, heard, and rested.

I know that's too much to ask for in a world fueled by white supremacy.

[Image description: Two images. The first picture is of a young Black man from California named Ryan Gainer. He can be seen smiling at the camera while standing in a parking lot. The second picture is of a Black woman named Diane Abbott. She was the first Black woman elected to the British Parliament. She is seen smiling at the camera.]

On Tamir's 21st Birthday

Image description: a picture of a 12-year-old Tamir Rice. He is smiling at the camera while throwing up a peace sign. The sun from a nearby window gives his soft brown skin a glow.

TW: discussion around police-involved shootings, murder, anti-Blackness, and racism.

Tamir Rice should be 21 years old today.

Tamir should be celebrating with friends and family, with a long weekend to do so.

But Tamir is not here today.

Tamir is not here today because, at the age of 12, he was murdered by a police officer who had been deemed emotionally unstable and unfit for duty by Independence, Ohio’s police department but lied about this to get a job with the Cleveland Police Department.

Tamir is not here today because he was murdered by a Cleveland police officer who never received a background check when he applied for the Cleveland Police Force.

Tamir’s family received no justice for his murder because a jury believed the officer who murdered Tamir was justified in his actions. After all, Tamir had an airsoft pistol that looked real, and there was no way the officer could know the difference.

Meanwhile, white mass shooters on murder sprees get lengthy negotiations, gentle trips to the police station and Burger King, and so much benefit of the doubt and so many excuses for their actions that it’s blatantly apparent whose lives don't matter.

Tamir should be celebrating the benchmark of adulthood.

But Tamir isn't with us today.

[Image description: a picture of a 12-year-old Tamir Rice. He is smiling at the camera while throwing up a peace sign. The sun from a nearby window gives his soft brown skin a glow.]

On Wedding Websites and Rulings of Hate

This morning, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled in favor of Lorie Smith, a "Christian" graphic designer who wanted the right to discriminate against same-sex couples seeking her services. This ruling went in her favor despite a Colorado law prohibiting discrimination based on sexual orientation, race, gender, and other protected characteristics. Smith's argument? That the Colorado law violated her free speech rights.

The conservative U.S. Supreme Court agreed with her.

How did this law violate her "freedom of speech?" Your guess is as good as mine, seeing how no one was twisting her arm to force her to take jobs or be hateful.

Lorie's raggedy ass could've politely declined the request, stating she was busy or unavailable, but she didn't. I'm not saying this move is the right or best way to handle things because it would still be a hateful move, but it wouldn't be as confrontational and escalated as this situation became. Do you know how many white people I've encountered who dislike me and my people but decide their vitriol for me isn't worth escalating, so they passively opt out of things? Way more than you'd think. I know members of LGBTQIA+ communities face similar situations. The couple who sought out Lorie's services could've moved on, likely knowing that there was an underlying current of hate to their request being declined but maybe not feeling like this battle was worth escalating (sadly, many of us have to pick and choose which battles to fight and when).

Lorie didn't have to make it an openly hateful thing with these potential clients, but she did. Lorie didn't have to be aggressively homophobic but chose to be. But Lorie was worried about her "freedom of speech" being taken from her. Real talk?

Lorie wasn't worried about her freedom of speech. Lorie was worried about decency infringing on what she believes is her freedom to hate others "in the name of the Lord."

And now every hateful, homophobic, transphobic, xenophobic, racist, bigoted, faux Christian business owner in the United States will refuse to serve countless communities because the U.S. Supreme Court has declared they have the right to do so.

You have the right to have your beliefs until your beliefs are constantly wielded as clubs of hatred, bigotry, and white supremacy that harm or murder others. Then they aren't beliefs anymore. They're hate crimes.

The U.S. Supreme Court thinks otherwise.

On Affirmative Action and the Designing of Systems

Affirmative action.

It's wild to me that the United States always finds a way to ensure the melanated, especially Black, Brown, and Indigenous folx, know that they don't deserve anything. No options. No opportunities. No possibilities for advancement or breaking the generational shackles of white supremacy.

It's wild to me that those who have power and positionality provided by their proximity to white supremacy (or, in some cases, those who sell their souls to garner favor from white supremacy) get to make decisions that impact those whom laws were supposed to support and amplify.

It's also wild to me that white supremacy continues to try and wield Global Majority folx as weapons against one another, in this case, trying to place the onus for their decision to dismantle affirmative action on the heads of AAPI communities so they don't have to take ownership of the fact that white supremacy's goal is to own nothing that it inflicts upon those it views as less than.

It's wild but not surprising.

It's all working by design.

Let's be honest with ourselves. Affirmative action was appeasement. Affirmative action had become a tool almost exclusively structured for white women to achieve academic access. The data shows this. Hell, white women were suing colleges and universities a few years ago because they felt they didn't get the college placements they "deserved." However, it was one of the only things still in place in this country that remotely offered educational access and socioeconomic progress to communities that were never meant to move beyond poverty, hate, and enslavement. And when you live in a country that likes to parade around how good it believes it is to its citizenry for the world to see, you find yourself clinging to the ledge where the little things you fought for by the tips of your fingers while hoping something better will come.

But we're not getting something better this time, are we?

Instead, we're getting an oily ledge that will impact the grips of melanated folx for generations.

All by design.

The beat goes on. The generational chains of poverty will continue to chafe the wrists and ankles of Black bodies. The progeny of the Black bodies that endured being considered subhuman slaves for hundreds of years will still be regarded as such. AAPI communities will continue to be weaponized to harm others in the name of whiteness, preserving the perceived right to power and comfort of whiteness while doing generational harm to AAPI folx. White women will continue to have the ability to harm melanated folx and take opportunities from their communities because of their proximity to white masculine cisgender societal norms, losing a system of advancement that catered to them exclusively for decades but believing that this decision is not aimed at them. Hence, their place in the pecking order is "safe."

The design is working.

It just isn't working for those who aren't white.

By design.

On Hate, Shock, Awe, KFC and Baskin-Robbins

I am legitimately mystified by how many people with privilege, power, and positionality are still shocked that they live in a country with so much hate, racism, homophobia, xenophobia, transphobia, and bigotry toward many communities as they watch mass shootings, hate crimes, and hateful legislation run rampant from coast to coast. I can understand being disappointed, scared, and even overwhelmed by the constant deluge of hate in our cities and communities via physical violence and legislation. That makes sense, especially for those of us whose lives, or their family, friends, and communities, are in danger. But shock? How is anyone still shocked after those harming many of us have been explicitly clear about why they aim to harm and kill others? At this point, there's a legitimate precedent that many communities are in constant danger due to bigotry and white supremacy. It's undeniable what's going on around us. So what are y’all still shocked about? 

That’s like going to KFC and being shocked that they fry chicken.

How are some people still so willing to try and rationalize or intellectualize harm to others? How are some people still so taken aback or surprised that a country built from colonialism, white supremacy, enslavement, and genocide is still perpetuating those original sins? The level of privilege, the lack of humanity, humility, and empathy, and the learned generational ability to shut out anything you don’t want to acknowledge while the world burns around you in some U.S. Americans is wild to watch.

I bet some of y’all are the kinds of people that are shocked that Baskin-Robbins has 31 flavors.

Shake my damn head.